Advent Conspiracy

This Christmas season already feels different to me, in the most wonderful way...even though it's not even December yet.  You see, I attend a church in AZ that has decided to re-claim Christmas.  We are making a solid effort to combat consumerism and refocus the season back toward Christ. And I love this. Please watch this video.



I grew up in a home where Christ was definitely welcomed in on Christmas morning. We would always read the Christmas story and my dad always reads an excerpt from a book that is among my favorites. But then we always dug in to the presents.

Don't get me wrong, I am super thankful that my parents went so out of the way every year to ensure that all our wishes were granted. It always took hours for us to open all of our presents. And I can certainly remember those gifts that will remain with me forever. But can I remember half of the gifts I have received over the years that, at the time, I had to have? Probably not.

And that season of our lives has past. We are now hoping to invite Christ in to our entire Christmas season more than five minutes, Christmas morning.

Which brings me back to why I am so thankful for my church.

Our pastors have awarded us the opportunity to dodge consumerism and for that, I am so grateful. I have longed to do something like this for awhile, but never knew how to go about finding an organization.

Here's what Mission Community Church is doing:
During the next 3 Sundays, and on the website, we can make a gift of $40. In return, these funds will go toward Somebody Cares, which is an organization in Chikudzulire, Malawi that reaches in to their community and feeds needy and orphaned children.  This $40 will feed one child for one year. Yes, you read that right. $40. One child. One year. 

The goal of this project is to feed 1,500 children, which I think is too small of a goal! Think about it. $40. We spend that on one dinner out. Starbucks for a week. One pair of shoes. A sweater. etc.

So Matt and I have decided, in lieu of gifts, to buy this gift and give money on behalf of our family members. We will wrap up the magnet as the gift and let our family see how a child was offered a second chance at life for their Christmas gift. I am not writing this to try to champion Matt & my decision and look holier than thou, but to attempt to inspire you to join us. In return, I do not need to rush off to malls and battle traffic and wrap gifts (which is actually no where in my strengths) and stress out and cross off names on my list. I simply get to go to church and give! And if I want to enjoy the tradition of Christmas-time shopping, I can simply go and browse and maybe pick up one small, thoughtful, inexpensive gift.

I'm not gonna lie, I get wrapped up in consumerism alot. I love shopping (even online). I get this urge to keep up with the Jones' or give the best gift of the day and watch that loved one's face light up. So this will be a different (and even difficult) season. But I look forward to seeing what God does through it!

Please, pray about the decision to potentially join this cause and reclaim Christmas!

 

Thankful...

This will somewhat resemble my typical "i love..." posts, but in the interest of this looming holiday, it's got a bit of a stereotypical, cheesy, beautiful twist...

1. I am thankful for a husband who is my exact match. There are moments when we are giggling or tickling each other or praying that I sneak a peak at him and could just cry praising God for his goodness.
2. I am thankful that I am back in ministry again. In the brief weeks since I have been back on a youth ministry staff, I could name a thousand little things I am thankful for: community, teaching, learning, growing, connecting, laughing, bonding and loving these girls that I have been given the privilege to live life with.
3. I am thankful that my parents are back in ministry. Enough said.
4. I am thankful for all the foods I get to eat that are, in fact gluten free! There are so many! Perhaps I shall pen a future post about the wonders of gluten free options.
5. I am thankful for the Kern family. These incredible people, whom I have never officially met, are following God with their giving and this means that I get an education that would have otherwise been outside of my means. I am eternally indebted and will repay them by living my life serving the church.
6. I am thankful that I have maintained a steady job through all of our country's economic woes. Not only that, but I am so thankful to work for a manager and district manager that I love with all of my heart.
7. I am thankful for my entire extended family. I could seriously take each individual member and explain hundreds of ways they have encouraged and inspired me. They are truly a gift.
8. I am thankful for knowledge. As I took the strengths finder test, one of my strengths is 'learner'. I was not at all surprised by this because I could literally spend hours in the library studying commentaries and dictionaries on my weekly assignments. Because I know I am studying truth. Each deeper level I dive uncovers more truth within Christianity and it is so beautiful.
9. I am thankful for running water. My incredible church is very involved on an international level with bringing justice to those who are oppressed. As I have seen pictures of the difference that is being made, I am so humbled that I live in a country where I never have to wonder if water will be flowing from my sink or shower.
10. I am thankful for the friends God has blessed me with. I look at areas where I am weak and they are strong and how we can learn from one another and I marvel.
11. I am thankful for our first home. Yeah, it's a tiny one bedroom one bathroom apartment with more crickets than the entire state of Arizona. But it's home. And I am thankful...

G-Free

So I was at work on Friday when all of a sudden, a horrific pain came shooting up my back/colon-y area (if I were to have to guess, I would say that area). It was gone as quickly as it had come but man was it painful. For the remainder of the day I was uncomfortable but did not experience that same type of pain.

The following day, I was at work, forgetting for the most part about the previous day when bam it happened again.  This time it was longer and less easily forgettable. I felt as though I needed to run in to the back room and cry. For the remainder of the day I was incredibly bloated and uncomfortable.  I took my lunch break and could not sit up straight because my stomach hurt so badly. I asked Matt to bring me cranberry juice and a colon cleanse in order to alleviate my pain...I took a colon cleanse and no such luck...

So after work, I began researching all of my symptoms online. After an hour or so of reading up on everything I began to see a recurring theme: celiac disease.

**sidenote: if you know me at all, you know I am always down for a new natural healing health practice, dietary restriction, homeopathic healing, etc. so you people all know where I am heading with this**

I was in such discomfort that I nearly missed Sarah's bachelorette party, which would have been awful.  I immediately knew that the problem was bad enough that I had/have to think fast and make sudden changes to my diet/lifestyle.

So...let me report...


I am now gluten-free!!!!

Andrea, if you're reading this you're probably dying that I am trying yet another thing...

I'm just going to try it for a few weeks and see how I feel. I need to go to the doctor and get officially tested to see if I am actually gluten intolerant or celiac.

So after several texts to Dena, who is a fellow (more experienced) gluten intolerant, I ventured off to my first gluten-free shopping excursion.  I had to drop off forgotten items to Matt at his school, which is conveniently located next to a Trader Joe's...So I walked in...

After a few moments of walking around aimlessly in a crazy-packed store (**not to self do not go grocery shopping thanksgiving week...good grief**) I was feeling desperate and unsuccessful. I found the nearest Trader Joe's employee, used my star skills and asked for help. This dear girl was so helpful and pointed me in the direction of a few of her gluten-free favorites.  She also informed me that they had a list of all of their no gluten ingredients and items in their store, which she tracked down for me! For your convenience, I found one online, too. 

I found a few really good items and realized that my absolute favorite thing at Trader Joe's, their white cheddar popcorn, is gluten free!!! wahoo!

So I will keep you posted on this area of my life but I have been gluten free (and pain free, mind you) for two whole days now with high hopes for it to continue!

It is well...

If you have been reading my blog for a little while you have probably caught on to a pretty re-occurring theme in my life...one that I am not too proud of, but a theme just the same. I have a really hard time loving myself. I hear friends and family confess their sins and I believe fifty thousand percent that Christ's redemptive work on the cross completely covers their sins. But for some reason, I have the hardest time stretching Christ's blood to cover mine.



A few years ago I read a book that was simply splendid. If you have glanced on the bottom of my blog, you will find that I keep a running list of books I have read and loved and would recommend...this book is on that list. It is called Cold Tangerines and I believe it has really gained in popularity during the past year or so (probably because of my blog...jk). Well in one of the vignettes of this book is nestled a little ruby...

Shauna talks about a disagreement she found herself in with one of her friends. As the days grew on and on and the disagreement was not being settled, she found it bothered her more and more.

Because she was the wronged party. She was innocent.

She found the offense tying her in knots and ruining her sleep because she could not believe that this "friend" would carry on with her days with the knowledge that she hurt her so deeply.  So what she did was put her on a hook. Shauna confesses that she found herself obsessing over this hook and fixated on the fact that she was wronged and refused to allow her friend off the hook for what she did.  The ironic realization she came to, however, was that it was upsetting her *(Shauna) far more than it was upsetting her friend.  In fact, her friend continued to carry on (seemingly) with her own life as if nothing had ever happened.

So Shauna decided to do something drastic.

It might not be what you're thinking. She did not call her up and let her have it. She did not publicly embarrass her or attempt to get back at her. She did the opposite.

She let her off the hook.

As I read this vignette I was very convicted about all of those in my life that I have on my own proverbial hook.  I decided then and there to let these people, name by name, one by one, off the hook. Not for their sake.

But for mine.

But what I am realizing that I have yet to do, is let myself off the hook.

I mess up and fail at maintaining some standards I have set for myself but rather than cover it in God's grace and learn from my mistakes, I beat myself up and find it affecting my relationship with God. I put myself up on the hook years and years ago and have tried to take myself a few times but have failed miserably in my attempt.

So i want all of you to hold me accountable to this end. I want to make sure that this time, it sticks.


On Sunday morning, during our worship service, we sang It Is Well (With my Soul) and man what a rush. Because as we sang about all of the things that are well with our souls, I decided that it is well with my soul to receive the love that my Jesus has been trying to hammer home to me. I bathed in his grace, mercy and love and for an instant, I believe I even felt the kind of love I believe heaven will be filled with...and it was well...






 For further reading...


Please read this paragraph from Cold Tangerines as well:

"I imagine that God does that to me, puts his hand on my head, on my heart, on my savage insecurities, and as he does it, he thinks thankful thoughts about me. In my best moments, when I calm down and listen closely, God says, "I didn't ask you to become new and improved today. That wasn't the goal. You were broken down and strange yesterday, and you still are today, and the only one freaked out about it is you."



Amen. 

De-Railed...almost...

Ok so literally my life has been nearly unmanageable lately...and just when I thought it was the craziest it's ever been, I added junior high volunteering to my plate...but you know how there are some things that drain you and there are some things that fuel you? I honestly feel as though adding jr. high volunteering to my list, though it's one more "responsibility", has offered me so much needed fuel. I have six little lives that are looking to me... Julia. Jordan. Julia. Lexi. Julie. Annie. And man are they adorable. They have reminded me why I am passionately in love with student ministries again.
So I promise that I will write you soon and I have been thinking of you often.
Sorry Megan.
Don't yell.
I love you all.

Ps...I am playing old fashioned hooky this week :) that's right...I'm ditching class...if you are a student reading this GO TO SCHOOL! But I needed a break this week! Hopefully it will award me the much needed breath I have so desperately needed.

I will leave you with this...

God is so good.

I will tell you more on why later...